September 16, 2009


Conclusions are my least favorite part of writing a paper. However, it doesn't mean I can't draw them over the whole Mario/Rachel incident, because continuing at this stress level would be detrimental to my health. I'd be like one of those type A people I generally try to hold myself back from becoming.

Anyways, I think Nyx put it best."it doesn't really matter whether she goes with him to counties or not. first off, you said you weren't even sure if you wanted to go anyway, and second, counties certainly does not define a relationship. you will have plenty of opportunities for mario-time in the future. so he's tied up for one day. there's heck of a lot of other days!"

Because really, when it comes down to it, the idea of large school dances freaks me out. That many people, and all the loud noise, and the sheer awkwardness of dancing in front of people I actually know... I mean, really, I should be glad that he's going with Rachel, because if I was going with him, I would be freaking the fuck out for an even longer period of time and at an even worse frequency than I am now, and really, at least he won't start dating her. At least, I hope not, because the mental image of that makes me want to retch. And cry. And then curl into a sad, lonely ball and surround myself with nice, comfortable pillows.

Plus, this way I can freely participate in anti-counties activities without beating myself up over being too chicken to ask Mario. For instance, spending an evening in my basement and playing stupid video games and talking about all the shit people in our grade are getting into at the time sounds like a lot of fun.

Please note that this doesn't mean that I don't want to hear any and all further developments on Mario's life (romantic or otherwise). After all, the crush isn't going anywhere, I'm just going to stop thinking about the crush in terms of some silly, pointless school dance. I will become one of those girls who lifts her nose and scorns those who go batshit crazy over the goddamned things.


Gretchen said...

we can hang out and lament our woes, bash on others, and sit around in your basement together!

i mean, i'm not...bitter per say cause i wasn't planning on asking anyone to start with, but i know i'm not going...if that's any consolation.

and if it's not...i tried.

Gretchen said...

my word verification was smazi
which is totally awesome

Tea said...

yes, it's a marvelous consolation, actually.

and that is not just awesome- it's schnazzy!