June 2, 2009

The Dodgeball Vendetta

I feel that the best way to start a post about this as-of-yet-unintroduced character is a four word sentence about him: Berk is a jerk.

Well, Berk isn't always a total jerk, but he sure as hell is annoying. We've been playing dodgeball in gym for the past week, and Berk (run in through a translator of the language that Nyx's mom speaks (I think) to English for his last name) has embarked on an extremely personal and rude quest to destroy any of my already meager dodgeballing abilities.

The first day of dodgeball, he did nothing against me, and I contentedly hung out in the back with Kathrya, Chelsea, and Nia. The second day, however, Berk immediately began attacking me, following shouts of "TEAAAAA" with a poorly aimed dodgeball. The situation was made more ridiculous by the fact that I'm fairly certain that he could have thrown a lot harder, he was just enjoying the theatrical effect of making me squirm. Chelsea says that her favorite part of this day was when Nia was standing in front of me (not that she blocks much, considering our height difference) and Berk yelled "Duck! I'm trying to hit Tea!" The numerous attempts continued the next day, which Berk finished by going in for some strange sort of handshake that is understood only by him, involving some sort of hands to elbows to high fives to a whole lot of confused Tea.

Today, we played the juniors, but he politely announced that, even though we were on the same team, he would find some way to hit me. He accomplished this be grabbing my shoulders and ducking behind me, distracting me enough that I got hit with a dodgeball that wasn't even going that fast. This injury, however, was not as bad as the one sustained when Eli dodged out from in front of me and the high velocity ball going after him slammed into my leg, resulting in a strange bullseye pattern that took hours to fade.

In other news, this video is entirely hilarious

6 comments:

Jackie said...

that video made my day. i have not seen anything that well-made in forever MAILBOX, OPEN MAILBOX!

maybe you should grow some spikes on your shoulders so that he can't do that again - or you could just maul him.

Tea said...

the image of me mauling him is mildly hysterical.

vicky/bruney said...

OMG I just watched that video and it's the funniest thing I've ever seen!!! the wingdings guy?!?!

vicky/bruney said...

BTW: I tried making a "patented tea permutations tree" but, I failed miserably and gave up after about 5 mins...

Gretchen said...

i never know who you're talking about!!
the story is funny but you're gonna have to tell me who they are...
the work verification thing for me is laddi, hahaaha

Jackie said...

so i checked out wingdings on word, and i was very disappointed to find out that MAILBOX, OPEN MAILBOX! simply means: comma, period!
also, if you want to say OMG! in wingdings, it comes out as

flag bomb up-finger pencil!